Oh Louis, Louis, Louis,
For years, you’ve been picking on Kansas City like we’re nothing more than a bunch of Miltons, Milhouses and Meg Griffins. Cheap shot after cheap shot, you’ve delivered defenseless blows to a city that’s never deserved them.
In 2011, you told Jay Leno that Kansas City is “a terrible place.” And in an email to your massive following this past September, you flatteringly wrote that KC is “an astonishing dump.”
Now, we here at MazumafyKC can take a joke as well as anyone. We get that you’re a comedian and poking fun is part of your shtick. You’ve admitted to The Pitch as recently as last summer that you actually “love Kansas City,” and in an email to your Kansas City-based followers in May, you said that “pretending to hate Kansas City when I don’t has been my own private little chuckle.”
The problem is, perception is often reality. And right now, the perception of Kansas City, thanks to your public jabs, is that we’re the black eye of America. As proud Kansas Citians, we feel it’s only right to set the record straight.
See, much like our beautiful Country Club Plaza each Thanksgiving, Kansas City is lit. The Huffington Post even named KC the “Coolest City in America” in 2014. In part, the online publisher wrote, “The food is amazing, nearly everything is affordable and the people are nice.”
Our entertainment districts, from Westport to Waldo, provide a vast array of great options. We have a burgeoning arts and music scene, and our suburbs feature some of the best public schools in the nation. And because we’re not overpopulated, we don’t have to spend 90% of our time stuck in bumper-to-bumper traffic or crammed shoulder to shoulder between strangers on the subway.
Kansas City is a city made of champions. We are Crown Town and Chiefs Kingdom. We are Sporting KC fanatics and barbecue addicts.
And while some cities produce cars or oil or cotton, we’re manufacturers of funny. For reference, please see Paul Rudd, Jason Sudeikis, Eric Stonestreet and Rob Riggle. Ask any of them how they feel about KC, and they’re sure to talk about it in terms that are usually reserved for mothers, babies and burnt ends.
Louis, we love you. You’re hilarious, self-deprecating and relatable. But as you know with “Pootie Tang,” everyone makes mistakes. So the next time you feel the urge to publicly disparage a whole city and its people, pick a place that’s more fitting. Like St. Louis.
The Coolest City in America